Fucking hell. I almost came in my pantswatching that.' `But... but what are you talking about? You're.. you're not gay!... Are you?' Julien's face ...as contorted with confusion. `I don't like to label myself son. I'm certainly not gonna label you.' `But... are you.. into guys?' Julien asked. His dad stared deep into his eyes. Julien looked back for as long ashis could. He felt his father's hand grasp his shoulder tighter. Suddenlyhe pulled the cushion from his grasp and Julien's. Iknew, however, from our years of marriage that he would not forbid it.We both knew that we were a team. He knows that I depend upon hisstrength and leadership and provision. I know that he depends upon mygentleness with people and the insights into them that that gentlenesselicits."You said he was frightened?" I asked."Frightened and bruised and exhausted," Nathan replied."There's the park!" The kids chorused, and we made the turn toward it.Once we had stopped, the boys shot out of the car. I began to think thoughts about Jill, a reasonable looking woman in her early forties. Events unfolded rather differently.Late Thursday morning I got a call at work from Jill, asking me for my help. She was at the hospital. As she sounded fairly stressed I drove there promptly. Her problem was that she was to be booked in for a couple of days for some tests and minor surgery; would I help Rebecca retrieve some things for her from their unit; would Rebecca be able stay the couple of nights in. I can not say I did not love him, but he was screaming. But what relationship is perfect? I was compromising because I was basically afraid of loneliness. And by the time we came to complete, even if we were totally opposed.Last year I was invited to a New Year's Eve party in a gay community. He is a lot of gay friends and often prefers more non-conformist parties.The party would have been like anything else if it had not happened to find Jon kissing passionately with another guy. After.
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